Crabs vs. Kochs

On August 31, 2010, in Al Gore, Barack Obama, by markboabaca

The sometimes organized Left has caught on to the big dirty secret about the Tea Parties and it is now blasting the news all over its blogs and media outlets : that conservative patrons exercise total mind and body dominion. Look, for example, at the weekend’s Lincoln Memorial rally hosted by Glenn Beck (from whom they take their cues ). Somehow the coercive Astroturf effect of Americans for Prosperity and FreedomWorks made hundreds of thousands of people — from all over the country — appear suddenly in Washington. They spilled off the steps of the Memorial past the Vietnam War Wall, the Korean War Memorial, the Reflecting Pool, the World War II Memorial, and onto the hill in front of the Washington Monument. As leftists like the New York Times ‘ Frank Rich and the New Yorker ‘s Jane Mayer reported, the billionaire private oil profiteers Charles and David Koch enabled AFP/FW to make it all happen. You see, the Kochs have lots of money — intoxicating, limb-controlling gobs of it . With it they lured those flag-waving lawn chair-toters onto planes and buses from all over the South and Midwest to head to the nation’s capital. These zombies, after enduring long lines to obtain their Metro farecards, then rode the subway to the Mall where they could congregate in the August heat for several hours and listen to Beck talk about God. And everyone knows that’s the message the Big Oil Kochs are paying for everyone to hear. But it’s pretty hard to put a good conspiracy like that over the deep-thinking Left , especially the environmentalist ones — at least for very long. Now nearly all of them have caught on to the scheme: Greenpeace , Center for American Progress , Media Matters for America , Mother Jones , the Rockefeller Brothers Fund , MSNBC , among many others — oh, and the White House too:

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